I Don’t Dare Using The Restroom

Today I was in a restaurant with my Dad and sister. It was a casual evening. Until I had to use the restroom. Well. I needed to but didn’t. Now this might sound silly to most people, since it’s just a toilet. Some of you will think now: “Oh, yes. I know that! They’re so dirty!” But that’s not the problem. I honestly don’t want to use the women’s restroom. Why? Because I’m not a woman. And I do not want to make a big fuzz about it, but I can’t help it, I wish it wouldn’t matter to me, but it does and it makes me feel bad. It literally makes me dysphoric using the wrong bathroom. I just can’t. But if I go to the men’s, where I belong, I get rude comments, weird looks, and they overall make going to pee a bigger task than it actually is. They make me feel unsafe. 

So I didn’t go. My stomach started to hurt and I waited till we went home.

I preferred stomachaches over going to the restrooms because cisgender people make it so hard for me, for us. Cisgender people make having to pee into a horror scenario. They make us want to stay home, because we’re too scared to use the restroom.

We choose between get yelled at and get beat up

between feeling humiliated and getting humiliated 

I know it’s not important to a lot of people. To most people it doesn’t matter. But to us it does. It’s the little things that matter. Please respect that. Let us pee. We are not evil. We are only human.

♠Sylveran♠

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2 thoughts on “I Don’t Dare Using The Restroom

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